The Page

A tale of intimacy and loss

Month: January, 2013

What I see

Forever It took me a long time, to understand who you were, and how it was that you came to us now, reminding me of a nearly all forgotten past. Sarah and you are one, even if herself did not see that when you first came in our lives. It is a complicated tale for us humans to fully apprehend – and yes, I know you are as human as us, only ahead of us, the being we will one day become. Sarah’s happy, for me and for herself. We are reconciled with you, Melissa, and I am reconciled with my lost youth.

Of course I cannot follow all the mathematics, and even less the physics, although Gabrielle’s spent a fair time explaining the transforms to us. Sarah is a much better mathematician, and she does understand quantum physics far more than I do. You and her had a good time discussing the reasons for Lagrangian logic, or we would say, mechanics. Old Newton must be turning round in his grave…

As you recall I am an incorrigible romantic: watching the two of you, in Gabrielle’s old house, laughing and juggling with those exquisite slides, I kept dreaming. How similar you two are, and how beautiful. Gabrielle said I had nothing to fear: neither she nor you are pretending to be extraordinary, merely living at a level of complexity slightly away from us, but still it leaves us plenty of space and time to enjoy ourselves, with you. Sarah has bought into the idea that I am now able to visit you, Melissa, in Gabrielle’s world, and that does not involve any risk to my body. Still it is a little difficult for me to accept that simple reality: what travels are quantum of information, to use our archaic description, and this avoids the quantum electrodynamics limits of old very gracefully. So, for now, I have given up deciphering the equations, I just enjoy listening to you, the sound of your voice, the warmth you and Sarah have brought to my life. As a writer I am very privileged.

But will I be able to tell our story? That is without betraying the sweet secret: Melissa is immortal.

Stars

Misty Morning This evening, near the fire, as the storm rages again and a furious wind shakes the trees in the garden, I relive through the events of last year.

I should see myself as lucky: a beautiful and loving wife, a charming and ever so helpful sister, a handsome son. And there is Melissa: a tender ghost from my childhood, whose protector may be an alien from another galaxy. What more could a man wish? Moreover what more could a writer in quest of stories wish? In my mind I have revisited Gabrielle’s old house many times. But I have not been invited back yet: could it be that Melissa’s teacher has changed her mind?

Sarah has asked me the question, as only her could identify the most logical explanation for the charade: isn’t Gabrielle a good proxy for an older Melissa? I think not, whoever Gabrielle is, she is not Melissa, but her own “person”, from out of this world or not. We talked about this last night, Sarah’s view was that Gabrielle/Melissa explains quite a few remarkable facts about recent events: Gabrielle’s evident knowledge of the little town, of Melissa’s youth, her apparent control over Melissa’s actions, at least with regard to me, Julian. And so far I have only “really” met Gabrielle, with Melissa’s apparitions, either second hand, or as in a dream… It is true that I have only “seen” my friend through Gabrielle’s suggestions, or should I say under her influence?

So, as of last night, our conclusion is that we wait and see, as we have done so far. Sarah agrees that I should not seek to visit the house again without a clear invitation from either of them. As a matter of fact I don’t think I could even find the place again… The sky tonight is too cloudy to see Andromeda, so I am merely imagining that world, remembering the immense structure Gabrielle showed me that night: was it as old as the pyramids of Egypt? Older perhaps? I then remember what Gabrielle said about her, or her species’s presence on this world.

I did take a look at Melissa’s page though, and noticed that she and Jane, my sweet sis Jane, are now friends. There is even a picture of Jane, or rather of Jane’s avatar, in a building that looks like an art gallery. The strange thing is that I don’t think it’s on Chi: is it that Jane and Melissa have met again, elsewhere? Did Jane asked to be “added”? I will ask Jane when I next speak with her. And if I get a chance to see Gabrielle, or Melissa, I will ask them how they “edited” the screenshot Jane had taken of that beach.

As I look out of the bay window, listening to the rain falling in the night, battering the flower beds, I am thinking back of the old town, the narrow streets, the medieval houses… I am thinking of a girl waiting for me at the school gate.